Archive | May, 2013

A Round of Applause

7 May

As I spend my last night in my dorm at USC, I’m reflecting like a goon. I’ve learned way too much this year, both academically (stupid calculus) and real life stuff. It’s crazy to think a year of my life just went by, ya know, casually BOOMSLAM cya later freshman year. I’ll never be a stupid freshman again, that’s a pretty awesome thing to be able to say. I like to think I’ve grown up a lot in this past year. I’m definitely not the same Abby that graduated high school last year. I like to think I’m a lot better. I’m different in so many ways, but all ways that I’m proud of. I’ve taken my studies way more seriously, and learned a thing or two about self-respect. I can’t say that these changes were made all on my own; every person I met this year has shaped who I’ve become, and will be for years to come. So, I think it’s time for a proper “thank you”. And if you’ve changed this year, and can relate to the following in any way, I think it would be a wise idea to thank the people, because something so small can go a real long way.

First and foremost I would like to thank my parents. They watched me cruise through high school with killer grades and minimal effort. They also watched me stumble a bit my first week here. But, when I was struggling, they never rubbed it in my face that I was learning the value of work ethic, but rather helped me develop a much stronger one, with actual study skills. Not only have they helped me in that aspect, but they have been nothing but supportive of me. When I wanted to take an extra class (which I do NOT recommend), they might have known better, but they gave me the go ahead, and then proceeded to answer my calls when I felt like whining about how much work that extra class was. I know it doesn’t seem like it would require that much more of your attention, but trust me. It does, and I learned my lesson. In such a new phase of your life, having the support of others is so crucial. And who better to provide you with that support than your parents, who are always going to love you, and always going to be there for you?

I would like to thank my friends I made this year; ToniAnn, Darby, Maggie, Brittney, Collyn, Ketaki, my fabulous big Melissa, among others (I’m just really tired and don’t want to bore people with a shopping list of all the amazing people I’ve met this year). Coming so far from home is really a big step, especially when you’re already coming in as the “new kid”. Y’all have made this transition much more bearable, and I appreciate it more than any of you guys know. All of you had people that went to your high school here, or had already had friends courtesy of being older and being in a sorority (I’m looking at you, Big”. Me, I had myself, and before I even got there I had Brittney and Darby. It was so great having some people to look forward to meeting before I even got below the Mason Dixon. You guys have seen me from the beginning to now, and been there for me throughout. Ups and downs, y’all were still there and THANKS UDABEST. ToniAnn, Maggie, and Collyn – y’all saved me from some serious roommate drama and I literally can’t even begin to thank you for that. Collyn, I hope you take a little bit of my annoying optimism wherever you go. ToniAnn, I hope you always have an orange peanut handy at all times. Maggie, I hope you get that fridge out of your back seat because honestly I don’t know how that’s going to work out. Regardless, you guys have made my semester so much easier. From the little bad lip reading videos to all those damn late night talks about god knows what (we know what, I’m just not going to blog about it), you guys were always great to have around. So help me god if y’all don’t come visit me at Aspyre next year…

It’s also important that my friends from home receive thanks too; Jess, Kim, Kara, Veronica, and Cassidy. You guys are the definition of true friends, the kind that can grow up without growing apart. I might be 1,000 miles away, but thanks to snapchat I never miss a beat with you guys. Veronica, congratulations on the engagement and I cannot WAIT to be at the wedding next year. Cassidy and Kim, congratulations on graduating high school. I am so proud of you guys for not messing up your lives yet, well, too bad at least. Jess and Kara, congratulations for being so awesome. We’ve been friends for so long, and we share ridiculous amounts of memories together. Kara, you’re making up for bailing out of going to UMASS all senior year by showing me Woo State! And Jess, well, just stay you. All of you are so important to me and I’m so glad that our friendship has thus far passed the test of time and distance. I may not be able to go party at Woo State with some of you all the time, or cruise in the Quabbin and enjoy bonfires in Dan’s backyard, but none of y’all have forgotten me and well it may sound stupid but thanks for that. It’s nice to have friends to go home to, especially when they’re all as awesome and as irreplaceable as you guys are.

And finally, I’d like to thank my boyfriend, Nathan. I’m sure he’s read this whole thing so far and seen absolutely nothing with him and I bet he was starting to get sassy. And I could be completely wrong, but that’s just my guess. Anyway… thanks Merp. Having you in my life has made me grow so much as a person. There is not a single thing about our situation that is ideal or easy, but it sure as hell has taught me a lot. I’m still incredibly impatient, and I think you know as well as I do that some things never change. That my dear will be one of them. But you love me anyway, so it’s fine. I think above all, I learned how to trust, which is beyond crucial given our situation. So few people have the ability to do what we do, and that’s something to be proud of. It isn’t easy to give such a big part of yourself to someone and just see them on this ridiculously irregular basis (which will be different come June 15 YAY). But, we did it, for a whole damn school year like what even? That’s nuts. And people thing I’m crazy, I’m not sure if they think you’re crazy, but I think it’s worth it. Why? Because you’re the best and if I have to sacrifice not seeing you every single day, for someone who is actually perfect for me, then I’m fine with that. Well, maybe not “fine” with it (trust me I’d love to see you more than I do), but I’ve learned to embrace our unique situation, our unique meeting, and our unique relationship. I could go on and on and bore the hell out of everyone reading this so I think I’ll just close it here and say thanks for making me a better person. I’m forever in debt to you for that, but I think I’ll find a way to make it up to you. Always, forever, and then some

Like I said before, me changing, that’s something I couldn’t just do alone, but I’m beyond happy that all of these people were here to aid in the process, and watch it happen. Cheers to one year gone, and cheers to another one twice as amazing coming right up.



Count Your Blessings

2 May

With the stress of finals setting in, even though my first final isn’t until SATURDAY (who the hell gives finals on a Saturday?), I find myself on a short fuse. Actually a short fuse would be an overstatement – my fuse right now is non-existent. I have zero patience and zero tolerance for anything that even remotely pisses me off. I mean yeah, it definitely isn’t right and I can’t use finals week to justify that kind of behavior, but its the fact of the matter and everyone around me knows it, and is feeling similar things. I get it. It’s the end of the semester, and we all just want to go home. Trust me, I haven’t been home since winter break in January, I’m ready for my own bedroom and my mothers cooking (don’t tell her I said that). That being said, my short fuse is really kicking my ass karmically this week. I feel like the more frustrated I get and play up the small stuff, the more it happens. I can’t say when it rains, it pours, because nothing in my life is really that wrong. But when it rains, it definitely rains. However the rain, that I sometimes like to be dramatic and annoying and portray as monsoon force drops, is really just a mist, or even those times where you swear you feel a raindrop and there isn’t even a cloud in the sky. 

Long distance relationships are hard. Relationships are hard when you live down the street from someone, let alone across state lines. I find myself lately getting really freaking annoyed with the couples who are blessed enough to go to the same school as their significant other, who see that person more than once every two weeks, who have the luxury of walking across campus so they can do lame stuff (which I of course take part in with my boyfriend) like watch crappy Netflix movies, and spend all day cuddling or laying in the sun, grab a bite to eat in the Dining Hall (mmmm, Horseshoe Deli), or even just say hi. Maybe I’m just bitter. Maybe I’m a little jealous. Definitely, maybe. But, I still have something many other people don’t. All throughout highschool, I always said having a boyfriend was stupid. And yeah, a bunch of failed relationships probably didn’t help my outlook any, but to me it was stupid nonetheless. I went into college saying the same thing. Annnnnnnnd then I ate my words, like my mother always told me I would. I found Nathan. Literally, stumbled upon him in the most obscure way. How, is irrelevant, but the point is, it happened, and I’ve never been happier. Pretty sure I’ve said before how he goes to college three hours from Columbia, SC at Appalachian State University in Boone, NC. I am completely guilty of complaining about missing him, no doubt there. But really, I feel bad for it. I know there are plenty of people who haven’t felt the way I do, who don’t feel the way I do right now, and who may never feel that way. (I’m optimistic I promise but hey, facts are facts). Every argument we have, whether due to my insecurity, or the distance getting to us, or him getting annoyed with me talking about certain subjects, silly, or serious, somehow always ends up with a good outcome. That’s gotta mean something, right? I mean some days I wake up and im bummed I can’t walk 10 minutes to a grungy all boys dorm to see him, but truthfully I couldn’t be happier that I at least have him. 

Sometimes, these things get overlooked. You get too caught up in the things you’re lacking, even if you aren’t really lacking them. Be glad youre a have, rather than a have not. Be it a significant other, a supportive family, or even material goods, be glad you are blessed enough to have such things in your life. For there is always someone who doesn’t.